New Moon in Aquarius January 2017

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Happy first New Moon of 2017 and also Happy Chinese New Year! A lot of new energy as we sink into what it feels like to be in this beautiful creation year. Many of us are holding the freedom and space of 2017 10 year after a very intense (but freeing) 9 year. The space to have agency over ourselves and not simply react is what we have all desired, and it is here now. But that still takes some getting used to.

In addition to this, we hold Aquarius energy of this New Moon: energy of the water bearer, the humanitarian, the one who can carry, cleanse, and release the energies of us all. There is a need to connect while also washing clean. There is a need to forgive and release. There is a need to get back to the basics of love–but without judgement and with forgiveness.

This is a wonderful time to honor the doubt that is coming up for you as a sign you are on the right path. A sign that your ego is working extra hard to keep you small and keep you in your comfort zone (even if it’s not where you want to be). None of this can stop you. You exist beyond all of it.

Reflection questions:

  1. Aquarius is the water bearer. Water allows us to be washed clean and starting over with fresh energy and cleansing ourselves. What do you need to wash clean in your life? What do you need to release and forgive?
  2. After you have identified an answer for number 1 and given yourself permission to wash it clean, what do you want to do with that? What’s next? Where do you go from here and how do you move forward?
  3. Aquarian energy of water bearer is also the energy of bearing the emotions of humanity. Not in a self-martyr way, but in the way of being connected to everyone and everything and understanding your unique energy pattern is needed as part of humanity’s divine assignment. Tapping into this energy, how do you want to show up as part of humanity? What work do you want to do?
  4. No matter what the ego will tell you, no person who has ever lived in service from a heart-centered place has done that alone. Holding your mission clearly for number three, what relationships do you need to cultivate and focus on to make this happen? Relationships with self, with Spirit, with people currently in your life, with people you want to call in.

Blessings to you and yours! Talk to you in a few weeks.

xx

Ern

Full Moon Cancer January 2017

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Happy New Year, happy full moon in cancer, and happy life! We welcomed 2017 a few weeks ago and I pray you have already begun to feel the relief of entering a 10 year (2+0+1+7=10) and ending a very powerful, intense, 9 year (2+0+1+6=9). 10 is the balance of masculine and feminine a chance for us to create the reality we wish to have as our own. Of course, this is only possible after we have done the work of releasing and purging (sometimes painfully) all the old, limiting beliefs of 2016. Rest assured, none of it was in vain as we are on the other side. We are taken care of.

This first full moon of 2017 takes place in the cry baby sign of Cancer. Of course, I say cry baby with all the love and respect in the world. Cancer gives us the space to tap into our emotions and those around us and hold them in a way so that we can move through them. It is a reactionary, desperate feeling; it is one of acceptance that the full range of emotions is part of the human experience and to pretend otherwise is to create a painful disconnect in the self.

As we have entered the 10 year and while the full moon is already associated with releasing, Cancer is the perfect sign for this full moon to allow us to move through some of these leftover purged emotions from a tumultuous 9 year. The worst is over. There is no un-healing.

Here are reflective questions:

  1. As we celebrate a New Year and as you have either intentionally created new energy you want to bring into your life for the New Year, we must honor all that was released in 2016. Make a list of all that you purged in 2016. Physical or non-physical. Go month by month. Honor it all.
  2. With Cancer being one of the most emotionally tuned-in and emotional in general signs, this full moon is a wonderful gift in FEELING whatever you released in 2016. Reading through your list that you wrote for number 1, make a new list of all the feelings that each of these things brought up for you. What emotions/places were you able to further access following that which you purged in number 1?
  3. Even if you are not someone who sets resolutions for the New Year, energetically, change is in the air. Amidst, what can you feel is shifting for you, even if it is rather involuntarily? How is the change showing up in your life?
  4. While the moon is in Cancer, the sun is in Capricorn — which means these two opposing sides may be contributing to the feelings of duality or a push-and-pull energy. This is necessary, but the strength of your foundation or home (which is associated with Cancer), can help to ground you through this. How can you show up for yourself and your home (energetic or physical)? What do you need to do for yourself to feel that your energy is grounded in stability through this back and forth? What can you commit to?

Blessings to you and yours as we begin 2017! All my love as usual.

xx

Erin

New Moon in Capricorn December 2016

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Hello, beautiful babies of the world! As we enter the last few days of the year 2016, we were blessed with one last New Moon. What a gift! Today’s New Moon is in Capricorn and occurs while Mercury is Retrograde in this same Earth sign.

Capricorn is the Earth sign goat/GOAT that is the one that climbs to the top of the mountain. The one that gets it done. The one that you can count on for persistence. With Mercury Retrograde and the New Moon in this sign, we are getting a double energy access of this beautiful focused Capricorn energy.

One way we may have been tricked into not using all of this energy to our highest potential is because Mercury is Retrograde. This astrological occurrence gets a bad rep, but it’s just different. Far too often with Mercury Retrograde, we project unnecessary fear and loss of control onto our lives when we don’t need to be. Yes, communication is a little messed up. Yes, people from the past may show up. Yes, there may be a few (a lot of) technological errors. But none of this makes you powerless! In fact, it is just there to shake up our routine and show us where we are holding old stories that don’t serve us anymore. And if there is any sign that can show up slow and steady and with the persistence to get through something, it is beautiful Capricorn energy.

So what to do with this New Moon, Mercury Retrograde, and the final days of the 9-year of closings 2016? Channel some Capricorn energy focusing on refreshed solitude, drawing awareness to yourself, and channeling that climb to the top of the mountain like the goat I know I am Capricorn gold. Reflective questions for you:

  1. With it currently being Mercury Retrograde and a lot of energy blaming 2016 for being “the worst”, many of us are absorbing energy that is soaked in giving away our own power and projecting fear onto our own lives. Even if you are not actively saying these things, I’m sure you have seen them on social media or heard it come from mouths around you. Understanding the abundance of this energy floating around, what fear stories are alive in your vibration right now? What false ego beliefs are you feeding into right now? #noshame #justawareness
  2. Looking at what you wrote for number one, re-write these fear stories into affirmations. Because we live on dense planet Earth, we will never not have ego thoughts, but forgiving them and replacing them with thoughts of abundance is always possible. For example, if you wrote for number one: “I’m not smart enough to work for myself,” you can re-write this as, “I am happily employed by myself and navigate all aspects of it with dedication and ease.” Remember to write your affirmations in present tense and with no negatives.
  3. Capricorn is an Earth sign. Capricorn is also a goat. This precious goat is the one who climbs that impossible mountain using tools that ground that goat to the Earth and typically in solitude. And you better believe that goat always gets there! With this imagery of Capricorn in your mind, what do you need to do/add to your life to reconnect to this type of energy? How does your precious solitude time need to look for you to be grounded enough in Earth to climb your mountain with your cute little goat feet?
  4. Capricorns have stamina. Not sprinter stamina, but marathon stamina. As we enter into the New Year, what do you want to see through in 2017? What do you want to manifest? Feelings, experiences, people, opportunities, ways of being. Let it all out, babbbbyyyyy!!! Keep this list close to you so you can reference it as you write goals and plans for 2017 and keep you focused. Everything is possible!

Have a blessed New Moon, end of the year, and Mercury Retrograde, and see you all in 2017!!!

xoxo

Erin

Full and Super Moon in Gemini December 2016

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Happy Full Moon in Gemini today, everyone! Not only is this the last full moon of the year, closing out a very powerful 9 year of endings for us (2016 = 2+0+1+6 = 9), but this full moon is also a super moon. A super moon is one that is closer to the Earth due to its location in its orbit, thus making it appear larger. Energetically, these moons tend to be more intense — so if you’re feeling some type of way and feeling it intensely, remember to be gentle with yourself as this time!!

Gemini is an air sign and is the twins. It is also a sign that loves to talk. A lot. Combine all three of these things, and we can begin to call in awareness to some patterns that may be taking place in our lives that may be hindering us. It is time to release that which no longer serves us via the form of habits in order to end this 9 cycle with love.

Today’s reflective questions:

  1. Gemini is beautiful and bold talking energy. Coming through hard and clear. How are your speaking habits? When and how do you speak? To yourself and others? In terms of taking responsibility for yourself and co-creating your reality? In terms of remembering that word is bond? In terms of reactions or responses? No shame, just awareness.
  2. How do you want to be speaking? What do you want to do for yourself? Practice right now. Write down an ideal way you would have a certain conversation. The literal words and also the intention behind them.
  3. We’ve been purging and releasing and falling and changing all of 2016. With just a few weeks left, what do you want to purge and release with intention? Where have you truly learned your lesson and want it to be done?
  4. Understanding the intense twin energy that is with Gemini today, how does what you wrote for number 3 connect to an area of your life in which you have freedom? For example, after learning a shadow lesson, where was more light then free to enter? We need both sides. Always. Identify this, and the welcoming of the lessons increases while the need to control them decreases.

I hope you have a truly blessed day. Love you all so so much! Praying for increased peace on our planet.

xx

Erin

New Moon in Sagittarius Nov 2016

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Happy New Moon in Sagittarius, my beauty babies!! We are just getting out of some pretty intense Scorpio energy, so this New Moon is coming at the right time if you are sick of your own shit and are ready to dead that old patterns and choose the new!

Last month we were deep in the energy of Scorpio. Scorpio is beautiful, beautiful energy that we need and is absolutely necessary to go deep within ourselves. Once we go to these new depths, it can be very tempting to get discouraged or stop doing the work or to give up on life or ourselves. However, the places Scorpio took us were all worth it, since we know if we want to call in abundance we must deal with the (temporary) pain of lack leaving. Everything is temporary. Everything is fluid.

Luckily for us, the Universe loves us so much and has gifted us lovely Sagittarius energy for us to tap into and use to our advantage with this New Moon. Sagittarius is a firey fire sign typically associated adventure, exploring, risk-taking, and just doing it. This is the New Moon to not hold yourself back. This is the New Moon to be renewed and energized after the insane deaths and depths of Scorpio. Don’t hold yourself back after what has been shown to you to be released. :)

Reflective questions:

  1. Scorpio last month gave us a lot of clarity and a lot of feelings to feel and move through. However, Sagittarius energy now gives us the chance to move away from victim mindset and back into self-empowerment. Where do you need to kick your own ass? Where do you need to take responsibility for yourself and get the eff over yourself? In the most loving way possible, of course.
  2. If you are able to kick your own ass as mentioned in number one, what types of adventure energy will you be able to allow into your life? What adventures can you go on in physical realm, and what adventure energy can you tap into in spirit realm?
  3. Going a little further with question two, if your dream life/partner/job/anything showed up today, who would you need to be to feel like you are a vibrational match to accept it? To feel like you are worthy? What would you need to do? Be? Say? Etc?
  4. Understanding that there is a very clear and important link between your boundaries and your success and freedom, what boundaries do you need to re-visit in your own energy? Reexamine? Reinstate? Reclaim? You are worthy of putting yourself first and protecting your own energy in this way.

Happy New Moon, my loves! Go forth and prosper!!

xoxo

Erin

What Counts As A “Using Problem”?: Reflections on Five Years Sober

On 29 October 2016, I joyously opened my eyes and woke to this precious life with the beautiful reality of being sober for f i v e whole years now. Five! What a miracle and a gift I do not take for granted every day.

I think about my sobriety a lot and in a lot of different ways. Sometimes I want to just have that *one* glass of wine with friends. Sometimes the familiar space of an art/music showing activates the muscle memory in my body that wants to use. Sometimes I see substances and get disgusted. Sometimes I am able to be truly present and I don’t even react to people using around me. All of these reactions are important and I honor them all as they remind me of the infinite complexities that come with my personal commitment to a substance-free life.

When I first got sober, I went into pretty intense isolation. I was a couple months into my master’s program, living in a new state where I didn’t have a lot of close friends (yet), and had a lot of school work and internship work to do. I had (consciously) wanted to stop using for at least six months before I actually did, but hey, no shame. All happens in Divine Timing. The isolation was a gift, as I am someone who is not afraid to ask for help and support but likes to do so on my own time to likes to figure it out in my own way before I begin to go public with it. The status of my life at that point set me up for a beautiful healing path.

In the beginning of choosing sobriety, there was, of course, the physical symptoms of withdrawal and the changing of what I was going to put into my body at social events. Habits shifting. Who and I talk to and in what ways. More paying attention to details. More awareness of things that always were blurry before this. I also started to read sober literature, people’s personal stories, everything I could find–it was a big world and I honestly didn’t know anyone at the time who got sober to reach out to for support. I just knew I had to stop using and trusted myself to figure it out along the way.

Of course, eventually I was guided to AA (Alcoholics Anonymous). I only went to three meetings in my life. I’ve never worked the steps. I don’t have a sponsor. In the first few years of not using, this was a source of confusion and shame for me. Am I going to relapse? Do I think I’m better than everyone? Am I blocking myself from receiving help? Is there something wrong with me? Am I bad at healing?

The answer to all of these questions is, of course, no. AA was and is not a space that was for me. I do have a copy of the Big Book and have read A Woman’s Way Through The 12 Steps but did not feel called to be involved in AA beyond that. Which is 100% okay and allowed.

I will say that AA is, of course, an incredible and magical resource and community group of people who all want to intentionally heal. I have many friends who go to AA and have loved it and when people talk to me about getting sober, of course, I always reference AA as a beautiful and free resource. But for me personally, it is not a vibrational match. I have thought about why for a long time, and I realized a lot of it has to do with the ways in which I have framed my own using problem with the using problems I grew up around.

The narrative I grew up around using and that is so often portrayed in the media, is one of violence and abuse and robbing others and losing all morals and values while under the influence. AA talks about this as being a different person completely when we are using–usually meaner and causing more harm to those around us by lashing out.

I used for almost a decade before I got sober, and I never wanted to harm externally while I was under the influence. I never got mean, never robbed anyone, never wanted to harm anyone, never drove drunk. I’m sure I wasn’t as kind and pure as I am now, but I did not turn malicious. This is not a value judgement on those who do get like that when they use, but it obviously created a huge gap in my understanding of using problems and part of why I didn’t realize how much using was harming me before I stopped.

Most of my using stemmed from it being one of the only places I felt like I had agency and control over my own life at a young age. I couldn’t move away or support myself financially enough to physically leave my environment, but if I was under the influence, I could leave my body mentally enough to survive. Plus, I could control what was going into my body (even though it was harmful), which gave me the illusion of safety and reclaiming personal power.

I was also a high-functioning user. My grades never, ever slipped. I was in all honors and AP classes. I played varsity sports. I maintained multiple jobs. I got into the number one grad program in the country for my major. I was excelling in pretty much everything I tried/was doing. There were no “signs” that I was using to a harmful extent that damaged my ability to show up and be responsible.

And there wasn’t because who was being harmed? Me. My energy. My connection to Source. I couldn’t think or decide or exist with full clarity and abundance because my energy was under the influence. And because I never took it out on the external world, it didn’t register in my mind as a using problem for a long time.

I do not judge or reject myself for using to the extent that I did. It was a survival tool. In AA they talk about having gratitude for our co-dependent behaviors because they kept us alive. Yes, we need to grow past them and put them down as we cultivate a reality of safety for ourselves, but if I hadn’t used in the way I had, I don’t know if I would have survived a lot of what I have been through.

For my celebration around five years sober I want to remind all of us that even if your narrative doesn’t match literature or understanding or mainstream conversations about it, to please please please tune in and listen to yourself. Ultimately, you know what is best for you and it is so important to trust that. Seek knowledge and support, but do not be afraid if what you find outside of you does not resonate. You are allowed to support yourself and pave your own path and free yourself in this way. I believe you. I trust you. I support you.

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A five year sober present I gave myself–A Course in Miracles tattoo. :)

Thank you for being with me on this path! So much love to all of you. xx

Erin

New Moon in Scorpio October 2016

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Happy last day of October 2016 (two months left in the year!) and Happy New Moon in Scorpio! This is a very beautiful and bountiful time as we can see visible changes in the seasons around us, as transition from fall to winter or spring to summer, depending which hemisphere you live in. What a beautiful gift in terms of trusting the cycles to always bring us back to what is familiar, even if it has to “leave” for a bit.

In terms of astrological energy, Scorpio is one of the most intense signs. It is typically associated with the energies of control and dominance, of intensity and no bullshit. We may have been taught to be scared of these words, but there is no need. Scorpio embodies these words and also holds the space of incredible sexiness and incredible divine femininity. Even though these energeries can seem opposing, they all fold into each other and work beautifully to give us lovely clarity and pure access to higher self wisdom.

If you are going through an intense time with this moon, trust that you are releasing that which no longer serves you in order to make room for that which will serve and that which you have asked for. Initial hardship does not mean permanent hardship.

Today’s reflective questions:

  1. We know Scorpio energy is associated with control. What do you feel controlled by in your life? In what ways?
  2. Now that you have identified what you feel controlled by, you can use powerful Scorpio energy to transmute this powerless feeling. How can you transform what you wrote for number one into a more loving and balanced relationship? If you are too blocked to answer this question, try this one: What is the ideal relationship with that you feel is controlling you right now? Of course, you are welcome to answer both. :-)
  3. The sexy/sexual/divine feminine energy of Scorpio cannot be denied and this provides us an amazing opportunity to get clear about our own definitions and blocks in this area for ourselves. What does sexy mean to you? How can you be more sexy in your own life? Please note this can but definitely does not have to do anything with sex. 😉
  4. A large part of being sexy is being confident and owning your energy and not apologizing for it. For this question: what do you want? Own it. Know you will get it. PS: What you truly desire is usually one step past what you are comfortable asking for 😉 Once you list what you want, rewrite your wants into present tense affirmations so that you can activate the energy of having, not wanting. For example: “I want perfect health,” can become, “I am perfectly healthy, whole, and sound.”

Blessings to you! Wishing you release and clarity, you sexy beings. Happy New Moon!!

All my love xx

Erin

New Moon in Libra September 2016

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Happy New Moon in Libra! Today’s New Moon is also known as the Black Moon because it is the second new moon in a month!!! What a beauty thing that is real and we get to witness. :-) This new moon also falls in the sign of Libra, so themes of balance and relationship are present.

In spiritual realm, black energy is typically associated with dark energy. Most of us have been taught that black/dark energy is bad, but guess what? It’s not. It is simply energy that is strong and sturdy and non-bending and offers us a beautiful perspective, should we choose to accept it. This Black New Moon is also typically associated with Goddesses who are given a bad name because they stand their ground and do not bend to outer pressure–and everyone knows if you are a woman and do whatever you want, you are definitely going to get shit-talked for holding your boundaries. Two of these Goddesses that this relates to are Lillith and Kali.

Not only this, but September was the 9th month of this 9 year (2016–2+0+1+6), and the number 9 is all about cycles ending and closing and changing. Plus…we had the 999 portals and we had the eclipses. A LOT of energy coming and going and changing and shifting. If you feel like you WENT THROUGH some shit…you’re not alone. 😉

Finally, we bring in the energy of Libra. Libra is the scales of justice. Of balance. Of relationships. Beautiful, beautiful Libra–reminding us how to balance the balance. :) Today’s reflective questions are:

1. What did you let go of in the month of September?

2. If you didn’t get a clear answer right away for number one, what counts as “letting go” for you? We let go of so much every single day, so what is the block to recognizing here? This is not about shame but just bringing it to the light. If you did get a clear answer for number one, hold this again. Now, sometimes we let something go but we didn’t truly acknowledge it because we didn’t notice it was gone. Therefore, to seal this energy closed, what do you want to say to what you let go of? No wrong answers–any and all feelings and reactions are welcome. :)

3. Bringing in the Libra energy of balance, what is an area of your life you feel you need to bring balance into? After all this letting go, our energy may be out of whack and now is a time to correct it. If you’re not sure, an easy way to get clear about this is to bring awareness to an area of your life where you currently get annoyed easily. For example, if you get annoyed every time you see an ad to join a gym or eat healthier, you are most likely ignoring your physical health. Everything is a mirror!

4. What are four boundaries you want to implement for October? Remember, boundaries do not make you a malicious person. They are necessary to keep you vibrating at your highest potential, and you are deserving of this always!!

Happy New Moon!! Remember, you can always email me at contactEEW@gmail.com to set up a private session where we go through these questions together or for private coaching in general.

Love you!!!!

xx

Erin

What Counts As Trauma ??

We are on Earth to feel good. To be our best selves. To understand, with clarity and ease, how abundant and full this life is. So what happens? Why can’t we do this? The short answer is…trauma. Various forms of trauma enter into our lives and they block us and we shut down because our pain body gets activated.

When this happens and we enter a low-vibrational moment of life, our egos are quick to judge ourselves and then we can shut down even further. However, the good news is with this, that we always have the power to move past thing once we move into allowing. Before we can get to allowing, we need to understand the ways in which we are blocking ourselves but not accepting whatever we are feeling is trauma.

So…what counts as trauma? When am I over-reacting and when am I right? At which situations do I feel valid and which ones I don’t? How can I move through this with ease and grace? Watch today’s video for some insights and clarity. :) Sending you all the love and abundance in the world. I hope this serves you.

xx

Erin

 

Black Lives (Still) Matter

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This week there were two more killings of unarmed black men in the United States: Terence Crutcher and Tyree King. Unfortunately, this is not new for the United States.

If you follow me at all, you know I exist in the very “radical” space of believing all bodies are worthy of living safely and peacefully in this realm. If you follow me at all and are white, I’m sure you also identify as non-racist. Which is great! Except for the fact that being a white, United States citizen means we are racist by default because of all that we have access to and the privilege of being white based on the systems of power that are currently in place.

But, again, if you’re following me, you probably already know that. Which is great! Now the next place your mind probably went is: “I’m not like other white people—I get it, I’m already doing my work.” And, you know what? You probably are! Or maybe the narrative that you don’t want to wish violence upon cops is coming up too…guess what I don’t want that either.

But the killings of unarmed Black people in the United States is and always has been out of control. Where did your mind go after that sentence?

Try not to spiral out of control with that thought and everything else that your ego implies and attaches to it. Come back here and just read that sentence as a fact. Because it is.

The next question is…what do we do to move past that? What can white people do in your/our/my individual lives (no matter where you’re/we’re/I’m at in your understanding of racial relations)? What can I do knowing that I will never “graduate” past needing to show up and interrupt all the ways white violence shows up in emotional and physical ways–regardless of how much I believe I personally am not a racist/contributing to racial oppression? What does the word “racist” trigger in me that I cannot go there emotionally? How can I examine myself? In a way that is not debilitating with shame or guilt? What is next for me in my own personal life? How can I continue to unlearn and be better? Read more? Talk to my white friends about being white? Use google (and not asking a Black person to give me an education) to teach myself some things? Call in more compassion for myself and others as I move through this? Sign a petition? Call my government? Something else? Note: answers can and will vary. :)

As usual, #BlackLivesMatter today and every day. Sending peace and blessings and healing to everyone. Love you all!!! ♥️♥️